Dear Friends,
My wonderful friend Andrew Temm's 1 month old niece passed away today. If you would please say a prayer for his family, I know that they need it.
Thank you for being a faithful community of believers who trust God.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Mother Teresa
I'm starting my first blog series. My blog series will be a reflection on the sayings of Mother Teresa. Recently I received a book called "The little book of Mother Teresa" by Sangeet Duchane. I have always had a fascination with Mother Teresa and the work that she did for the Lord and finally I have a book on her. Mother Teresa's dedication to God is inspiring and encouraging, she is my modern day hero.
This little book on her life has pictures and brief memories of how she became who she was. With each new chapter there is a saying and thus my reflection on her words.
The first of the series reads:
"It is easy to love the people far away. It is not always easy to love those close to us. It is easier to give a cup of rice to relieve hunger than to relieve the loneliness and pain of someone unloved in our own home. Bring love into your home, for this is where our love for each other must start."
As I read this my first thought was, "Oh I'm skipping this one..." And then the conviction came upon me and I realized why I wanted to skip this quote. It is all to easy to ignore the ones who live with us. I have two instances because I live in two places. I have my home in Joplin and my home in Oklahoma.
I have had a great home life. My parents have been married for 30 years and I was raised with morals and unconditional love. However, my brother Jacob and I have never really seen eye to eye. We have nothing in common and he is quiet. When he does talk it's about cars (to which I have no knowledge on). My brother was married when he was 21 and his wife and I do not get along. Well in the beginning at least. I was so mean to her. She was raised differently and she is pretty quiet herself and well, we just didn't "hit it off". These are the people that are hard for me to love. Why? Why is it hard for me to love my brother? If I can't love my own biological brother then how am I going to love others? I treat my friends and even strangers better than I treat my own family. THIS IS EMBARRASSING. But it's time for me to be called out! I have to confess, repent, and ask for forgiveness. I must bring love into my home. If I am not faithful in loving my family then I cannot be faithful to other people! I must love the unlovely, even if, it's my own brother.
This goes much further than love for me. It goes to me being a selfish, self-righteous, brat. I think that God really wanted me to be humbled by this and made aware of who I actually am towards my brother. I am not better than my brother. We are different but it's time to embrace it! Maybe learn about what he likes and call him once every couple of weeks. It's time to dive into a relationship with my family. It's time to embrace and love them in my own home.
I hope that you don't struggle with this. But I've looked at people's families and I've noticed that in most families there is always an outcast... someone who doesn't quite fit in. Look at your own life. Look at your family or the people you live with. Evaluate. Do you have love in your home?
This little book on her life has pictures and brief memories of how she became who she was. With each new chapter there is a saying and thus my reflection on her words.
The first of the series reads:
"It is easy to love the people far away. It is not always easy to love those close to us. It is easier to give a cup of rice to relieve hunger than to relieve the loneliness and pain of someone unloved in our own home. Bring love into your home, for this is where our love for each other must start."
As I read this my first thought was, "Oh I'm skipping this one..." And then the conviction came upon me and I realized why I wanted to skip this quote. It is all to easy to ignore the ones who live with us. I have two instances because I live in two places. I have my home in Joplin and my home in Oklahoma.
I have had a great home life. My parents have been married for 30 years and I was raised with morals and unconditional love. However, my brother Jacob and I have never really seen eye to eye. We have nothing in common and he is quiet. When he does talk it's about cars (to which I have no knowledge on). My brother was married when he was 21 and his wife and I do not get along. Well in the beginning at least. I was so mean to her. She was raised differently and she is pretty quiet herself and well, we just didn't "hit it off". These are the people that are hard for me to love. Why? Why is it hard for me to love my brother? If I can't love my own biological brother then how am I going to love others? I treat my friends and even strangers better than I treat my own family. THIS IS EMBARRASSING. But it's time for me to be called out! I have to confess, repent, and ask for forgiveness. I must bring love into my home. If I am not faithful in loving my family then I cannot be faithful to other people! I must love the unlovely, even if, it's my own brother.
This goes much further than love for me. It goes to me being a selfish, self-righteous, brat. I think that God really wanted me to be humbled by this and made aware of who I actually am towards my brother. I am not better than my brother. We are different but it's time to embrace it! Maybe learn about what he likes and call him once every couple of weeks. It's time to dive into a relationship with my family. It's time to embrace and love them in my own home.
I hope that you don't struggle with this. But I've looked at people's families and I've noticed that in most families there is always an outcast... someone who doesn't quite fit in. Look at your own life. Look at your family or the people you live with. Evaluate. Do you have love in your home?
Thursday, January 14, 2010
love hurts
Today i miss my orphan babies. Some days seem unbearable. It seems like I never stop thinking about them. I wonder how they feel, what they look like, what they are learning, what their new favorite phrase is, what adventure they are going on, and if they've been matched. I miss seeing their little faces light up when they get an album of their new family. I miss the joy that they brought me and the unconditional love that they gave me. I miss China. I miss my China babies. Sometimes I ask God why I don't feel called there... I ask him why? Why is my heart there but it's just not... right. And then I remember to but my trust and fear in Him and to believe that I have another plan. But I do know, that one day, I'll have my own little Asian baby. If anything, God brought me to China to show me that one day I'll adopt as many children as I can because they all deserve a home and love.
Love hurts. But it's worth it.
Love hurts. But it's worth it.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Devastation in Haiti
Dear friends,
It is our responsibility to stand in the gap for our brothers and sisters in haiti. Please pray for them. I can only imagine the turmoil and pain they are going through. Not only was Haiti a rough place to live in on a normal day but I can only imagine what it's like with everything destroyed. I am fearful and confused but I know that God is with his children. I look at the news and can hardly open my eyes. How will anything be fixed? How will people survive? It is not my part to question, it is my part to pray, so please, please, pray for haiti. There are tons and tons of orphanages and missionaries and Christians in haiti. Don't forget about them in a few days, write them on your hand and pray... unceasingly that God will intervene.
Kinsey
It is our responsibility to stand in the gap for our brothers and sisters in haiti. Please pray for them. I can only imagine the turmoil and pain they are going through. Not only was Haiti a rough place to live in on a normal day but I can only imagine what it's like with everything destroyed. I am fearful and confused but I know that God is with his children. I look at the news and can hardly open my eyes. How will anything be fixed? How will people survive? It is not my part to question, it is my part to pray, so please, please, pray for haiti. There are tons and tons of orphanages and missionaries and Christians in haiti. Don't forget about them in a few days, write them on your hand and pray... unceasingly that God will intervene.
Kinsey
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Sheep
Let the struggles begin. It seems that these past few weeks have been extremely hard. I have not been a "good girl," not that being good matters but my attitude and actions have not been Christ like. I also haven't been disciplined in reading the Word and praying. It always seems to go hand in hand, struggles and no motivation to follow. Once again I've been a stray little sheep lagging in the back of the flock. Luckily God's been in the back with his staff guiding me and gently hitting me with the staff to get back in line.
I wrote about the sermon called "one thing" and how I was going to pray about what one thing I needed from God this year. Well I think he's been telling me all week. The one thing I need from God this year is for HIM to be enough. I need to be satisfied and content in the Lord. I also need to acknowledge God's faithfulness and power. He is so powerful, i must remember this. I'm not too surprised that I need to ask God to be enough. I always seem to put things in front of him... and i hate that I do it! I want to know his Word and who he is, so this year I have the hope that God is going to teach me satisfaction and contentment in him. This is probably almost guaranteeing that I won't be getting married anytime soon (haha). Doug Welch said in a sermon at Ozark, "If the ache of your life is only a shadow, you've created an idol" This really hit home with me because too often I complain about my singleness and my loneliness and I put "relationship" on the pedestal and think "if only..." Luckily Doug opened my eyes to the fact that I had created an idol! I had no idea and it felt good to be convicted.
I can only imagine what the next months have in store for me. When you want to change usually it comes with pain and hardships, being refined in the fire is not a comfortable process but if I want to become like silver I have to go through the fire. So I hope you look forward to praying for me, I'm certainly going to need it!
Blessings,
Kinsey
I wrote about the sermon called "one thing" and how I was going to pray about what one thing I needed from God this year. Well I think he's been telling me all week. The one thing I need from God this year is for HIM to be enough. I need to be satisfied and content in the Lord. I also need to acknowledge God's faithfulness and power. He is so powerful, i must remember this. I'm not too surprised that I need to ask God to be enough. I always seem to put things in front of him... and i hate that I do it! I want to know his Word and who he is, so this year I have the hope that God is going to teach me satisfaction and contentment in him. This is probably almost guaranteeing that I won't be getting married anytime soon (haha). Doug Welch said in a sermon at Ozark, "If the ache of your life is only a shadow, you've created an idol" This really hit home with me because too often I complain about my singleness and my loneliness and I put "relationship" on the pedestal and think "if only..." Luckily Doug opened my eyes to the fact that I had created an idol! I had no idea and it felt good to be convicted.
I can only imagine what the next months have in store for me. When you want to change usually it comes with pain and hardships, being refined in the fire is not a comfortable process but if I want to become like silver I have to go through the fire. So I hope you look forward to praying for me, I'm certainly going to need it!
Blessings,
Kinsey
Monday, January 11, 2010
A few pictures from my 22 Birthday Celebration
Celebrating at Agave my favorite Mexican Restaurant.
April, Me, and Jovy
Lindsey, Me, and Korri on our way to the Moolah Theater where we watched "Up in the Sky" and sat in leather couches!!!
Ben and I had a challenging time getting a good picture so I'll put up my favorite.
Anyways, I had such a wonderful time celebrating my birthday all week long! It was so fun to watch my worlds collide as I spent time with my friends. I was able to introduce my best friends to my mentor and all of them to my friend I worked with in China. Life is good.
Hopefully I'll have something inspiring to say in a few days,
Blessings.
Celebrating at Agave my favorite Mexican Restaurant.
April, Me, and Jovy
Lindsey, Me, and Korri on our way to the Moolah Theater where we watched "Up in the Sky" and sat in leather couches!!!
Ben and I had a challenging time getting a good picture so I'll put up my favorite.
Anyways, I had such a wonderful time celebrating my birthday all week long! It was so fun to watch my worlds collide as I spent time with my friends. I was able to introduce my best friends to my mentor and all of them to my friend I worked with in China. Life is good.
Hopefully I'll have something inspiring to say in a few days,
Blessings.
Monday, January 4, 2010
XXI , year of the Ox
I was born in 1988, year of the dragon. My mom and dad have told me that when I was born it was snowing. I looked it up online. It snowed 12.1 inches the day I was born (Oklahoma City). What's funny is I really do not like snow, unless I'm with friends and I have a big hill and an awesome sled. 21 years have past and I like to think back of all the memories but it's impossible. I can't wait until i'm in heaven and I don't have to worry about memory loss and I'll be able to think about all the memories in my lifetime.
So time for another evaluation of the years past. Luckily for me my mom documented "great" moments in my life such as when I walked, the first words, etc... I won't bore you with those. I already bored you yesterday with brief moments of the year so I'm not going to go down that path.
However, I am very curious to see what is going to happen with my life. Graduation is 5 months away. It's absolutely terrifying typing that out. I have a few ideas of what I want to do but I know a lot of rejection is going to come my way. I'm going to apply for a lot of jobs, even jobs that are out of my league but I'm trusting that God will provide for me and everything will work out. It's going to be exciting to see how everything turns out and to "start" a new "phase" in my life. I'm totally pumped about grad school, I'm not however, totally pumped about the possibility of moving back in with my parents but we'll take it one step at a time.
Maybe now that i'm out of Ozark and officially not a college student but a "grad student" I'll meet someone. Someone once told me (Charlie Landis) that you are more appealing and more dateable when you're not in college and sometimes even irresistible ... (I might have added the last part :) ) I have hope that "mr. right" is out there waiting for me, but for now I'll be patient and content....
And now for another list, a list of things that happened while being 21.
1. I turned 21 in New York City, Celebrating with a shot of espresso
2. I went to Florida with my friends Korri and Chelsea for Spring break and chilled in a retirement community (blast!!!)
3. I said goodbye to a ton of graduating friends.
4. I raised $5000 to go to China.
5. I went to China and worked at New Day, and it inevitably changed my life.
a. Met Katie and Amanda from Manhattan Christian College and they began family to me
b. Met Jovy, Jamie, Caroline, and many others in China and have made friends with them for a lifetime
c. Perfected the use of a squatty potty.
d. Went to the beach in China... with Chinese friends and had many many memories--- funny and terrifying
e. Learned a little bit of Chinese, can use chopsticks, and eat rice like no bodies business.
f. Consider myself a "mother" to the orphans and feel responsible for their rescue.
6. I came back from China...
7. I started my senior year
8. I quit Gymboree and starting working at a Daycare
9. I started volunteering at church in the Pre Teen Youth group
10. I was accepted into John Brown's Graduate Program.
I'm excited for XXII year 22. I'm praying for God's blessing and guidance during a changing time.
Love,
Kinsey
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Good Intentions verse God Intentions
The New Year always brings peace. It's the start of a new beginning a new year and a new time to set forth goals to become someone you want to be and to but aside who you were. I've been thinking about New Years Resolutions and i have a few.... At least I have a few things that i would like to happen but just happen to be out of my control (example: going to JBU for Free and well the obvious a relationship).
At church today (lifechurch.tv) I listened to Craig Groshell and was really inspired to have "God Intentions" not just "good intentions." His main question throughout the sermon was, "What do you want from God?" If i could have one thing from God what would it be. I have to answer this question and then center my prayers around it. Some people might wish for a friend to be saved, contentment, restored marriage, freedom from addictions, and the list goes on. I haven't decided what I want from God. I don't know what my "God intention" should be. Over the next few days I'm going to be praying for guidance from the Holy Spirit and analyzing what God might want me to have from Him.
Another question that Craig had was "What do you lack?" My thought was "so so much". I'm also going to be praying about an awareness of what i'm lacking. Currently I feel like I'm living in disappointment and sin. I hate the struggles that i'm going through right now. But hey, it's time for a change... right?
The third question was "What do you need to let go?" I also do not have an answer for this one. I thought I think i've forgiven everyone... But i'm sure there is something hiding from me trying not to escape the clench of my fist.
So 2010 should be an interesting year. I'll let you know what my answers are to the questions. But if you want to answer them yourself I think it would benefit you to listen to Craig's sermon on www.lifechurch.tv the sermon is called "One Thing".
I've also been thinking, should I reflect on the year past? well sure.
My favorite and most meaningful memories
1. My trip to New York City - Class with Gordon Venturella, Exegeting the American City
2. My summer internship at New Day Foster Home. Probably the best time of my life. It was extremely hard but God taught me so much about his faithfulness and unconditional love. Part of my heart is still in Beijing...
3. Senior year!!!!! woot woot!!!! Sad to go but i'm ready.
Shout out to my friends
1. Korri Lee Sears -- My right arm. Always there for me in everything, even my most dramatic moments
2. Chelsea Combs -- My starbucks buddy and crazy friend.
3. Morgan Weece -- My breakfast buddy who wakes me up in the morning.
4. Lindsey Doolittle -- My boss and friend...keeps the income flowing.
5. Molly Kruse -- My purple loving friend who allows me to love pink and not be ashamed.
6. Jess Moore -- My Honorary roomate.
7. Brady Roberts -- My friend who lives in Kansas and who I miss a lot.
8. Charlie Landis -- My card playing, awkward, deep conversations, share everything in life friend.
9. David Heffren -- My card playing friend when homework is not in the way....
10. Andrew Temm -- My "I've got an awesome apartment" and can make good spaghetti friend.
11. David Anderson -- My Asia loving friend
12. Ben Anderson -- My love hate relationship friend
13.Joseph Lang -- My reliable/always at pre teen friend
14. April Fillman -- My second mother and brings me so much laughter friend.
15. Karen Feiock Smith -- My married her high school sweetheart and we've been through so much together friend
16. Alicia Jacobsen -- My crazy best friend since 3rd grade.
17. Tracy Smith -- My Arkansas cutest accent and loving heart/always there for you friend.
18. Camille Conely - My Alumni/don't let stereotypes get us down friend.
19. Caitlyn Lippett -- My funny/i understand your craziness friend.
This turned into a long list... I think the title should now be called "I thankful for these..."
Well, this is all I can think of right now.
p.s. after the 3rd picture I got sick of trying to upload and such... sorry, but you can search through facebook if you need picture to picture detail :)
peace and love,
Kinsey
At church today (lifechurch.tv) I listened to Craig Groshell and was really inspired to have "God Intentions" not just "good intentions." His main question throughout the sermon was, "What do you want from God?" If i could have one thing from God what would it be. I have to answer this question and then center my prayers around it. Some people might wish for a friend to be saved, contentment, restored marriage, freedom from addictions, and the list goes on. I haven't decided what I want from God. I don't know what my "God intention" should be. Over the next few days I'm going to be praying for guidance from the Holy Spirit and analyzing what God might want me to have from Him.
Another question that Craig had was "What do you lack?" My thought was "so so much". I'm also going to be praying about an awareness of what i'm lacking. Currently I feel like I'm living in disappointment and sin. I hate the struggles that i'm going through right now. But hey, it's time for a change... right?
The third question was "What do you need to let go?" I also do not have an answer for this one. I thought I think i've forgiven everyone... But i'm sure there is something hiding from me trying not to escape the clench of my fist.
So 2010 should be an interesting year. I'll let you know what my answers are to the questions. But if you want to answer them yourself I think it would benefit you to listen to Craig's sermon on www.lifechurch.tv the sermon is called "One Thing".
I've also been thinking, should I reflect on the year past? well sure.
My favorite and most meaningful memories
1. My trip to New York City - Class with Gordon Venturella, Exegeting the American City
2. My summer internship at New Day Foster Home. Probably the best time of my life. It was extremely hard but God taught me so much about his faithfulness and unconditional love. Part of my heart is still in Beijing...
3. Senior year!!!!! woot woot!!!! Sad to go but i'm ready.
Shout out to my friends
1. Korri Lee Sears -- My right arm. Always there for me in everything, even my most dramatic moments
2. Chelsea Combs -- My starbucks buddy and crazy friend.
3. Morgan Weece -- My breakfast buddy who wakes me up in the morning.
4. Lindsey Doolittle -- My boss and friend...keeps the income flowing.
5. Molly Kruse -- My purple loving friend who allows me to love pink and not be ashamed.
6. Jess Moore -- My Honorary roomate.
7. Brady Roberts -- My friend who lives in Kansas and who I miss a lot.
8. Charlie Landis -- My card playing, awkward, deep conversations, share everything in life friend.
9. David Heffren -- My card playing friend when homework is not in the way....
10. Andrew Temm -- My "I've got an awesome apartment" and can make good spaghetti friend.
11. David Anderson -- My Asia loving friend
12. Ben Anderson -- My love hate relationship friend
13.Joseph Lang -- My reliable/always at pre teen friend
14. April Fillman -- My second mother and brings me so much laughter friend.
15. Karen Feiock Smith -- My married her high school sweetheart and we've been through so much together friend
16. Alicia Jacobsen -- My crazy best friend since 3rd grade.
17. Tracy Smith -- My Arkansas cutest accent and loving heart/always there for you friend.
18. Camille Conely - My Alumni/don't let stereotypes get us down friend.
19. Caitlyn Lippett -- My funny/i understand your craziness friend.
This turned into a long list... I think the title should now be called "I thankful for these..."
Well, this is all I can think of right now.
p.s. after the 3rd picture I got sick of trying to upload and such... sorry, but you can search through facebook if you need picture to picture detail :)
peace and love,
Kinsey
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