Mirror Mirror on the wall...

I've been participating in an amazing "young women's" bible study. We have chosen the study by Beth Moore called, "A woman's heart, God's dwelling place" and while at first i had my doubts and critiques I have come to realize that i have learned so much from this study. Beth is taking us through the the Old Testament and the Tabernacle and it's importance and how we can apply it to our daily lives. This past week we were studying the Alter of Incense and the Basin Laver. This may seem boring to you but it's incredible to see how God used particular tasks and sacrifices to bring about atonement and glory.

The Basin Laver was an interesting study. I learned that this was made out of the wealthy women's mirrors. So when the priests went in to wash their hands and feet they had to look at themselves in the mirror. The reason for this is so they could become right with God. I thought this was so cool because I really struggle with admitting my sin and bringing up who i am to God. Usually I just pray, "God forgive me of my sins" and move on. But what i realized is this is not what God wants from us. He wants us to look at ourselves, acknowledge our sin, and have sorrow for our sin so that we might change.

Even after studying this I found myself praying the same prayer over again. It is so hard to acknowledge my sin and to look at who I am when i'm sinning. Then I realized that I haven't been sorrowful over my sin in a months. I haven't wept during a prayer over my sin for a long long time. And you know what? I need too. Communicating with God and explaining to him why i do things not only helps prevent me from repeating old habits but it also deepens my relationship with God and helps me hear the Holy Spirit.

So, when you enter your tabernacle this week, make sure you take a look in the mirror. God desires open communication about every part of our lives, even sin. Jesus bore that sin when he was crucified on the cross... the least we can do is admit the wrongs we have done.

As Beth would say, "Go in peace beloved ones..."

(I really love Beth Moore and all of here little sayings, especially her Arkansas twang...)

Blog Design Help.

Here's the deal, I need help updating the style of my blog. I want the birds gone... I can't figure it out! Can anyone help me???? Oh please oh please oh please!!!!

Boom!

Hey friends! Well as exciting as my life is, I thought it was time to update you on a few things.

1. I'm still single.
2. I'm still jobless.
3. This makes me very much available.


Okay okay, enough of that. Next Thursday (the 17th) I will get the opportunity to present my internship for Mountain. During this time I will tell them how this will not only benefit me, my home church, Mountain CC, but also the Kingdom. I'm trying to raise $15,300. I'm praying that my church will be my main supporter, not only financially but also through prayer. Please join me this next week in asking for God's favor and guidance in the provision of my funds so that I can go to Maryland and learn about "Glocal" ministry.

If you would like to look at Mountian's website it is mountainchristian.org --- not only is their missions program incredible but so is the history of their church and the other incredible ministries being produced from their church.

Well, Blessings to you this week!

Kinseymac


In the meantime I'll be smelling the flowers...

home is where the heart is.

Currently I'm reflecting on the places that i call home. Sometimes when you're in a state of boredom and loneliness you remember how much God has blessed you in the past. It's good to remember where you've come from. It's good to be excited to see where you'll go. So while I await the future i'll remember the tough times, the good times, the bad times, and the provision that God has blessed me with and refined me in through the past, but i'll remember to live in the present because even though this time seems mundane and boring God is teaching me daily and allowing me to spend time resting in the arms of my family.

battlefield

To all of my prayer warriors it's time to get your prayers on. I've been talking with Mountain Christian Church (in Maryland) about my internship. I've figured up my budget and I need to raise about $15,000. It's going to cost me around $1275 to pay my bills a month.

So I'm beginning my first stage of support, PRAYER. I need prayer, all the prayer i can get. Currently i'm jobless but tomorrow I have an interview at a daycare, please pray that this goes well. It's full time and I can use this 3 month salary to help support myself. Secondly I need prayer that God will guide me, that he will show me the way and help me with all of the logistics. Figuring up health and car insurance is confusing stuff. Also, pray that churches will find favor with me. This internship will be such an incredible learning opportunity. My internship is under the "glocal" minister. This means that I will be working with global and local ministries, missionaries, and such. This is my passion and I'm so excited about it. The reason I'm so excited about it is because churches need missions ministers. The church is called to reach the unreached and I want to educate and help the church fulfill the great commission.

All of this to say, I'm starting to get really excited about all of this. I think it'll be a great opportunity. It's going to be a lot of stress and hard work getting up there but if God wills it, it'll all fall into place.

Thank you for your prayers.

P.S. the goal is to have me out there... SEPTEMBER 1... EEK!

Paving the way

I'm officially a graduate of Ozark Christian College! We had an amazing commencement service on Saturday. To me it felt more like a commissioning service, sending us out to reach the nations. I was encouraged and filled with joy, pride, love, and admiration. I was so excited to know that I went to such an amazing and supportive school where my professors pray for not only me but all of the students... by name.

I said goodbye to some of my closest and dearest friends. Some i'll see in a few months, others in a year or two. I also said goodbye to my home of 4 years. It's so strange to think that I'm no longer a student at Ozark and that I'll never be moving back into the dorm (that is unless I become a dorm parent... haha!) I came to this realization when my mom pulled into our driveway and we started unloading all of my belongings. And then it came... emotional breakdown. I just started bawling. My sweet mom just asked what i needed and tried to calm me down. I guess it's just a process (at least for me).

Here's the thing, I have to keep a positive attitude. I have to realize that it's my time to give back. So many people have been investing in me and now it's my time to show them what God has done in me. I received a really awesome note on graduation day from my friend Connor. He gave me a new perspective and it read this, "I know it may seem like you're leaving a lot behind, but you're not. you're just paving the way until the rest of us can join you in the real world; and frankly, I can't think of a better person for the job that you." It's true. Eventually all of my friends will leave Ozark and move on with their lives. It's exciting to think of all the possible connections that i'll have in the future and the possibility of working with some of my friends in ministry. I'm excited to see how God works in the lives of the ones I call family. What an amazing adventure ahead of me (us).

I thought I'd post a few pictures of the day


Connor thanks for the encouraging words!


Benny Bear thanks for teaching me about useless "modes" of music


Andy Pants thanks for always make me tea!


David thanks for being an amazing friend and brother!


To my girls Molly, Morgan, and Jess thank you for being amazing friends, sisters, and prayer warriors.


Dave and Charlie, Thank you for showing me true unconditional friendship. Thank you for teaching me the art of nertz and blogging. You guys are great.


And a final Group photo!

knock knock, who's there?

It's so surreal. I never actually thought graduation day would come. But here it is! 2 days away. Tomorrow we have baccalaureate and then saturday is the BIG day! GRADUATION! I can't believe it. You know, when I was a senior in high school I never thought about being a senior in college I guess my mind just didn't fast forward that much. It's really funny because everyone always seems to be surprised when they find out you go to a Bible college and at times I get on a high horse about it. Yeah, I go to Ozark... I'm super spiritual and sacrificial... Oh wow! How prideful i can be! However, I never thought of what would happen after graduation. Everything i've been studying for, for 4 years has come to an end. Now I'm expected to go out and serve God. And you know what.... I actually want to. It's completely terrifying and it isn't easy finding a place to serve either. I'm nervous to say the least. It feels like finding a job at a church is going to be a long, bumpy, blurry road ahead of me. It's imperative that i remember God's faithfulness... he has been teaching me his faithfulness for a year on purpose (I do believe...).

These college years have been pretty selfish. Everything has been centered around me. Money, study, and friendships... even serving. Yes, these acts have glorified God but they were pretty selfish and self centered. But now it's my time to give back. It's now time to let God do the choosing and the sending and the guiding. Often times we hear the phrase "God will open up a door" and many times we are selfish in our thinking and believe that God is opening up that door for our needs but have you ever thought about the person on the other side of the door? People are out there waiting to hear the Gospel. Maybe for the first time or maybe in a different light. Whatever the reason God is placing me, you, and my dear graduates in doorways of people who need a little nudge of love in the right direction. It excites me to think about who might be waiting on the other side of the door. I'm excited to see who my friends open the door to too.

So I leave you with this thought,

"When one door opens, sometimes it's for the person on the other side..." --- Chris DeWelt

Go on, open the door... remember how exciting it was to watch the doors open on Reading Rainbow? Well, I guess life is kinda like that... now go see what's on the other side.